How to Repair Your Relationship After One of You Cheats

Spread the love

Cheating breaks the foundation of trust that a relationship is built on. While it is not impossible to repair that foundation and rebuild your relationship on it, it isn’t easy and will take a significant commitment from both people involved. One person cannot fix the relationship: Both must be willing to heal themselves and the relationship. You also need to go into repairing it with the understanding that not all relationships can be repaired. If you cheated and your partner decides they can’t regain their trust in you, you have to accept that it is the consequence of your actions.

Here are three steps toward repairing your relationship after an affair.

Ensure absolute transparency

Part of rebuilding trust will be ensuring absolute transparency with your partner until they can trust you again. You may feel defensive about this, but you need to remember that you broke the trust. One way to offer absolute transparency is to look up phone number of any person in your contacts. Even if you have a name with the contact and tell your partner who it is, you should be comfortable with them looking up the phone number to make sure it is who you said it is. Your partner should have access to the full name, phone number, email address, mailing address, social media information, and personal information of the people you talk to and interact with regularly. Verifiable contact information that matches personal information is how your partner will know you aren’t lying again.

Get help

Cheating causes a lot of negative emotions and insecurities that aren’t going to be easy to work through. The best approach is to start the work with the help of someone trained and experienced in helping couples through these types of situations without distractions. offers couples retreats designed to help couples get to the root of their issues so that they can start the rebuilding process. Affairs are never just about physical activity: They are rooted in insecurity, dissatisfaction, and an inability to face problems. In most cases, people cheat because they are unhappy with themselves and are looking for a thrill outside themselves to feel good. Getting to the root of that issue is necessary to ensure cheating won’t happen in the future. Additionally, the cheated partner needs to delve into themselves to decide if they can genuinely forgive and trust again.

Stay consistent

The retreat is just the first step to examining your problems. After the retreat, you need to stay consistent in getting help to discuss your issues and strengthen your relationship with your partner. Even when your partner starts to trust again, that trust will not be as strong as it was before because, in the back of their minds, they will always know you were willing and capable of cheating. Keeping accurate information from your partner for any reason will be seen as a betrayal of their trust. So when it comes to names, phone numbers, social media information, or personal information about people your partner asks about, you have to be consistently honest every time. Hiding something because you don’t want your partner to get jealous or insecure is an excuse to hide something from them. If you’re going to repair your relationship, you have to take the initiative.

Cheating has destroyed many relationships, and it may feel unbearable, but couples have come back from affairs and built a solid and lasting relationship. It is possible if you are both willing to work on yourselves and your relationship. While you can’t heal each other, you can heal yourselves.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *